Nick Clegg announces plan to revive party fortunes by nailing his scrotum to the floor

Pride's Purge

(satire?)

The Liberal Democrat leader Nick Clegg has announced a radical plan to revive the flagging fortunes of his party and improve the Liberal Democrat’s electoral prospects by pledging to nail his scrotum to the floor if his party wins the general election in 2015.

In an interview on the BBC’s This Morning show, Mr Clegg listed 5 major policies the Lib Dems would implement if they win the next election:

  • All elected Liberal Democrat MPs and party peers will be made to have “I must not break my written pledges” tattooed in large red or black Gothic lettering across their buttocks.
  • Taxpayers will be given a cast-iron guarantee that if Liberal Democrat treasury minister Danny Alexander ever so much as thinks of agreeing with George Osborne on any subject ever again, he will be made to write it out 12 times on 12 sheets of crisp new A4 paper, and…

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About thepositivevoice

We originally set out to advocate and campaign for and on behalf of people living with HIV in Greater Manchester. But we chose to slightly change our name by adding beyond. Therefore our name is Greater Manchester & Beyond of People Living With HIV & AIDS. Cause there are many issues that affects people living with HIV we now look ate other health and social care issues that will affect people living with HIV in their everyday lives. For the purpose of this site we have chosen a strap-line name hence our user name here - this is of course "thepositivevoice". The reason for this is often the issues that affect us can be quite daunting and discriminatory to our very existence. So whatever negative we hear and see - we endeavour to turn that into a positive. There are many examples where a negative has turned into a positive and one of those example is the term "Queer" - well that is also quite interesting as some people in the lesbian and gay community don't like that very word - some have decided to own it. Therefore any person that calls another person (the example here) queer - some gay people will reply yes we are. As time moves on and I as the author of this blog - information will be never-ending. So watch this space.
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