(not satire – it’s UK education today)
Have any government ministers ever actually spoken to a 4-year-old child?
Because formally testing children at that age has got to be the stupidest idea the coalition has come up with yet.
This is what a formal test of a 4-year-old is likely to look like:
EXAMINER: Hello, what’s your name?
EXAMINER: Hello, Tom. And what’s your surname?
4-YEAR-OLD: I like sausages. Do you think we’re going to have sausages for tea today?
EXAMINER: Erm, I don’t know. Your surname?
EXAMINER: Trump’s your surname?
4-YEAR-OLD: He he he …. (blowing raspberries and laughing hysterically) … that’s what a trump sounds like.
EXAMINER: Right. OK. Well maybe we can forget the surname. Let’s have a look at these shapes and can you tell me which one is the square?
4-YEAR-OLD: (without moving) Yes.
EXAMINER: Can you show me by pointing?
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